Most people tend to be optimistic because a positive outlook on life improves mood and helps them achieve success. However, excessive cheerfulness is not always appropriate: it often leads to ignoring real problems. In this article, we'll talk about the concept of toxic positivity and explain what else it can do.
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So toxic positivity — What kind of “beast” is this?
This is a concept that describes an excessive desire to remain optimistic even in situations where it is not appropriate. Toxic positivity is accompanied by a refusal to acknowledge negative emotions and experiences, which can lead to suppressing feelings and ignoring real problems.
Signs of toxic positivity
#1 Denying negative emotions
The person avoids or ignores the manifestation of any negative feelings. This prevents them from living in a healthy way and being allowed to live in a healthy manner.
#2 Imposing positivity
People often use general phrases like “everything will be fine” or “let's see the positive side of everything”, which can devalue others' experiences and ignore their real feelings.
#3 Ignoring the problem
A person avoids discussing difficult or unpleasant topics under the pretext of maintaining positivity. This prevents problems from being solved.
Why toxic positivity is bad
#1 Suppressing emotions
Suppressing feelings can have negative consequences for both mental and physical health. When we ignore emotions, this can lead to an accumulation of internal tension, which in turn increases the risk of developing anxiety disorders. Physically suppressed feelings can come in the form of headaches, digestive problems, and other psychosomatic symptoms. Moreover, the refusal to acknowledge and express emotions prevents their healthy resolution, which can have a negative impact on relationships with others. The ability to recognize and express feelings contributes to emotional well-being and helps build more sincere and trusting relationships.
#2 Lack of empathy
Toxic positivity, with its emphasis on maintaining an extremely optimistic attitude, often leads to a lack of empathy in relationships with others. When a person imposes “joyful” attitudes and refuses to acknowledge the negative emotions of others, this can devalue their experiences and create a sense of misunderstanding. Instead of offering support, toxic positivity makes people feel isolated in their struggles. The lack of empathy in such situations prevents the establishment of sincere and trusting relationships, as the person's real feelings and needs are ignored.
#3 Generating pressure
Toxic positivity can create pressure, causing people to hide their true emotions and pretend they're OK even when they're not. Expecting constant optimism and refusing to acknowledge negative feelings can lead to internal conflict. A person may feel obliged to meet unrealistic standards of happiness, which in the end only exacerbates their emotional state. Instead of working through his problems, he is forced to suppress them. This can lead to even more stress.
#4 Rose-colored glasses
Toxic positivity — a direct way to devalue yourself and your efforts. It is she who will encourage us time after time to justify a boss or partner who does not even think of appreciating us. The solution is to take off your rose-colored glasses and look the situation “straight in the eye”.
How to avoid toxic positivity
To avoid toxic positivity and create a healthier emotional environment, you need to follow a few simple guidelines.
#1 Acknowledge emotions
Recognize that negative emotions are also a natural part of the human experience and deserve attention. Sadness, fear and guilt will help you get to know yourself better.
#2 Practice empathy
Listen to others with empathy and understanding, allowing them to express their feelings without judging or trying to come up with a solution right away.
#3 Avoid clichés
Instead of using phrases like “it's going to be all right,” offer real support or just sit by and listen to the person.
#4 Be honest with yourself and others
Recognize your own emotions and don't be afraid to demand the same from people. Don't try to suppress natural feelings to maintain the appearance of positivity.
#5 Create a discussion space
Encourage open conversations about feelings and experiences, both positive and negative.
#6 Develop emotional literacy
Learn more about your emotions and learn how to identify and express them correctly.
#7 Maintain balance
Strive for a balance between optimism and realism. This will help you always be in the moment and respond appropriately to any life events.
#8 Encourage healthy expression
Use creative ways to express feelings. Drawing, writing, dancing — all this will help you live any emotions in a healthy way.
#9 Take a proactive stance
If something unpleasant happens, don't go to extremes (“It's terrible, it's over!” and “Come on, it'll get better somehow”). It's better to look at the situation objectively and decide to do everything in your power to fix it in the future (“Yes, it didn't work out today, but I'll take into account the mistakes and try to do better tomorrow!”).
Toxic positivity reminds us of the importance of balance. Recognizing all aspects of human experience is key to emotional well-being, healthy relationships, and professional success.
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